How child friendly is your home? That may seem like an odd question but when we think about it, maybe it is not. Very often a difficult child who is acting out or misbehaving is expressing a sense of insecurity or unease. That may well be due to a chaotic routine.
Routine and structure are really important for any child. We all know how children can insist on details when we tell them a story or maybe no one does that any longer! In the old days, children loved to get all the details right and if you left out something, then you were in trouble. Children love a routine and they love to know exactly what is coming next. The same principle applies to getting up, having breakfast and getting ready for school.
I was interested to read a recent article in the Wall Street Journal which claimed that good parenting was very similar in many ways to good management.
Management seeks to build trust between the various levels of employees. If that is lacking then production will suffer because too much time will be spent on managing distrust which is destructive. Building on trust will produce results and the same is true for parenting.
Holding children accountable for their actions is also a great way in helping the parent when confronted with a difficult child. We can teach a child from very early on that they are accountable for their actions. We show them the consequences of their actions and emphasise that rewards and bonuses are in place for the good behavior. Learning how to distinguish between the two is all part of becoming more mature and growing up. This is very similar in the workplace where a good system of rewards and bonuses can really be a great incentive for employees.
If you have worked in a company where there is a certain lack of distrust between management and employees and above all where there is no system of rewards or systematic praise for great effort, then you probably know that this company will not be successful at all in the long run. Neither will the company be a very happy workplace.
It is just the same as parenting a difficult child. That is why the article I mentioned above is so relevant to parenting and how we can learn certain principles from management.
The best way to approaching the whole problem of parenting a difficult child is to get help by adopting a child behavior program. It needs to be well written by someone who has been through the traumas of disturbed childhood and who has been a parent himself. James Lehman, the author of this particular program meets these two criteria and is also one of the reasons why this program won a recent prestigious parenting award. Time to check it out.